Some of you know the events of this past couple weeks and some do not. We weren't purposely keeping anyone in the dark, we simply have been focusing on healing and putting our lives back together again.
For those that don't know, Kristi would have been 24 weeks pregnant this weekend. Two weeks ago today, we made our second trip in as many weeks to Women's Hospital. This time over concern that she had developed a fever and may have had an infection.
After two days at Women's, her condition had deteriorated and there was evidence that her water had broken. Through what can only be described as divine providence, she was transferred to Forsyth Medical Center on 3/21 because the NICU at Women's was full.
Within minutes of arriving at Forsyth and meeting with the high risk specialist, Kristi went from awake and alert to septic shock. The only option to save her life was to deliver.
Our son, Jacob Eli Tisdale, was born at 4:58pm on March 21st. The NICU team at Forsyth were able to resuscitate him and transfer him to the NICU. Even though his chances were very slim, they did everything that they could and were able to stabilize him for a few hours.
3 hours and 27 minutes later at 8:25pm, our boy went ahead of us to be with his brothers and our Lord.
We are absolutely broken hearted to lose another sweet baby, yet we are so thankful that Kristi is still with us to be able to grieve our son.
For those of you who have been praying and encouraging us through the last 4 months, we are grateful beyond words and love you dearly. Jacob and Kristi were being prayed for by people all over the world, most of whom we've never met. It is overwhelming to imagine all of those prayers being heard by the Lord and knowing that those petitions, though they weren't answered exactly as we had hoped, were absolutely part of why she is still here today.
If you've been on this roller coaster ride with us for the past 7 years, I'm sure you're just as ready for the ride to be over as we are. We never could have imagined how excruciating it would be to try and expand our family, yet we will not lose heart.
Each of our six losses have been painful. Four before we knew them and our two boys that we got to spend such a brief time with. Yet, with each loss we have experienced God's mighty work in motion. In the midst of our pain, we have been given the opportunity to share our grief with others that are suffering through the loss of a child, we have seen the hope that is within us grow with anticipation that one day we will be reunited with our little ones, and we have shared in the unity of the body of Christ as our brothers and sisters have supported us through prayer and encouragement.
In spite of our pain and grief, we continue to put our hope and trust in the Lord. It may seem crazy or impossible that we could still believe after all the suffering we've endured, but God is good and he ALWAYS fulfills His promises. He gave Kristi a promise after we lost Logan, and we will cling to that promise until it is fulfilled. There are times that we can't understand His plan or why it seems that we have to endure such loss, but all He asks is that we trust Him. So, we will continue to press on, knowing that one day our family will grow and it will be in a way that we never could have imagined and only He could accomplish.
Thank you for continuing to pray for and support us as we walk this path. We love you guys.
Josh and Kristi
"He comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God." - 2 Corinthians 1:4
"Therefore we do not give up. Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day. For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory. So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." - 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
"Though You Slay Me - Shane and Shane"
I come, God, I come
Return to the Lord
The one who's broken
The one who's torn me apart
You strike down to bind me up
You say You do it all in love
That I might know You in Your suffering
I come, God, I come
Return to the Lord
The one who's broken
The one who's torn me apart
You strike down to bind me up
You say You do it all in love
That I might know You in Your suffering
Though You slay me
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the One who's all I need
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the One who's all I need
My heart and flesh may fail
The earth below give way
But with my eyes, with my eyes I'll see the Lord
Lifted high on that day
Behold, the Lamb that was slain
And I'll know every tear was worth it all
The earth below give way
But with my eyes, with my eyes I'll see the Lord
Lifted high on that day
Behold, the Lamb that was slain
And I'll know every tear was worth it all
Though tonight I'm crying out
Let this cup pass from me now
You're still all that I need
You're enough for me
You're enough for me
Let this cup pass from me now
You're still all that I need
You're enough for me
You're enough for me